Ernest Smith

This is the final post in a series of posts that have focused on a message that I gave a few months back on the topic of relationships and purity.  I believe that instead of asking the question “How far is too far?” God would rather us ask “What should I be doing when it comes to relationships?”

When we ask that question, a whole new world of thinking opens up for us.  We begin to realize that we should…

Pursue Jesus more than anyone else.

Care more about loving others and meeting their needs, rather than my own.

And the third point that I made in the message, a point that should characterize how we choose someone to spend the rest of our life with, is…

I should be interested only in someone who loves God more than me.

Have you ever made a list of characteristics that you want in your spouse?  Come on, you can admit it.  This is a safe place.  I know I have and to be completely honest, I am glad that I never kept that list around…so that I wouldn’t be reminded of how shallow I was.

Now, don’t get me wrong…desiring certain characteristics in your spouse is a good thing.  However, many times those lists are filled with characteristics that only Jesus could meet or characteristics that are meaningless.

I remember a few of the characteristics on my list.  I wanted my spouse to be blonde, blue eyes, love kids, want to be an overseas missionary and love God.  I guess two out of five isn’t bad.

I love Sara and although she only has 2 of the 5 things I listed here, one of those things quickly trumped any of the other characteristics.  Sara loves God more than anything else…including me.

This is the one characteristic that should be at the top of anyone’s list for a future spouse.

Why would we settle for anything less?  Why would we want our spouse to just simply love God?  Why would we want someone in our life that elevates us, or anything else, above God?

We shouldn’t…yet so many fall prey to the mentality that we want to be loved so badly that as long as our spouse loves God…that is enough for us.  But, should it be?  Should we settle?  NO!!!!

Don’t ever just settle…even settling for someone who loves you a whole lot is not worth it.  Finding God’s best is finding someone who loves God more than you.  In order to find that person, you must be confident in God and confident in whom God made you to be.

Don’t settle.  Don’t be content with someone who loves God and LOVES you.  You want someone to love you, but you want someone who LOVES God.  That should be the quality at the top of your list.  That should be the number one characteristic of your future spouse.

What characteristics do/did you want in a spouse? 

Why is it difficult for so many to only be interested in someone who loves God more than themselves?