Ernest Smith

Over the next two posts, we will discuss a particular subject that God has been arresting my heart with lately.  It is a subject that is not discussed in the Church often, or at least often enough.  It is a subject that I have taught on less than two or three times out of 14 years of speaking.  It is a subject that many Christ-followers believe in, but have a hard time practicing.  The subject I am talking about is…

The Spiritual Discipline of Confession

Confession literally means to acknowledge or disclose of sin in one’s life.  Usually the picture that people get when one thinks about confession is a person entering into a confession booth in a Catholic Church and sharing what sin they have committed to a Catholic priest and receiving actions steps to be purged of the sin.  This picture, and others, is usually what diverts people away from practicing confession in their own life.

Over the last few weeks, God has been challenging me to learn more about, but more importantly, practice more often the spiritual discipline of confession, but I have to be honest…Confession is difficult for me.

When I think about confessing sin that I am currently struggling with, I begin to get sick to my stomach and many ungodly thoughts race through my mind.

                What will the person say when I tell them what I am struggling with?

                Will people respect me any more after I tell them what I am dealing with?

                Will people share with others what I have shared with them?

So many thoughts race through my mind and not one of them centers around confession being a good thing.  I only think about the negative.  I only think about how confession could hurt me.  But, why?  Why do I think these negative thoughts?  Why am I so concerned about what will happen to me?

Well, let me give you a few truths about why confession is hard for me and let’s see if you can relate.

I have a hard time with confession because…

1. 1.       I am a leader and leaders should have it all together…right? 

In a world where we are so critical of the leaders who are over us, we have developed a wrong mentality that leaders are supposed to be perfect.  If they are not, then they are not worthy of being followed.  This mindset affects our willingness to confess sin.  If we confess sin in our life, then we will not be a leader worthy of following.

Clearly this mindset is warped.  I would say that the best leaders are the ones who are vulnerable enough to admit they have faults and willing to confess those faults to others in their life.  Yet, although I believe that, I still can find myself stuck with the mindset that leaders should have it all together and that can prohibit me from confessing my sin.

1. 2.       I am prideful.

Probably the biggest reason that I struggle with confession is because I am prideful.  I am the type of person who believes they can do anything.  Therefore, if I am struggling with a sin, I don’t need to confess it to someone; I simply need to just stop doing it.  It should be that simple, right? Well, it never is and yet this mindset holds me back from experiencing true freedom from the sin that I am trying so hard to fight on my own.

1. 3.       I am only looking at the immediate rewards.

Sometimes I struggle with confession because I only see the immediate rewards that come with not confessing.  When I don’t confess, I am safe to continue living the way I’m living.  When I don’t confess, I don’t have to worry about people judging me.  When I don’t confess, I don’t really have to change if I don’t want to.  When I don’t confess, I don’t have to worry about being humbled.  Yet, these are the immediate rewards.

The ultimate, and everlasting, rewards come when we confess.  What are those rewards?  Stay tuned…

Why is confession difficult for you?

What rewards has confession brought in your life?